Resolution Reset: The Year of Realistic Wins

By Brianna McGill, MS

The new year resets the calendar and gives us a chance to reset ourselves. It’s a fresh start. When we sit down to make resolutions, we think about social media trends (Dry January, anyone?), family traditions, culture, and even the “old you” from last year. Life is complex, so it’s natural for our goals to reflect that complexity.

But as we enter the new year, let’s make sure the goals we create help us embrace change without setting ourselves up for frustration. Life is full of competing priorities of family, relationships, and more. When goals are too rigid, they often fail once reality kicks in. Research shows that failing an overly ambitious goal can hurt motivation and self-esteem, while realistic goals lead to steady progress (Höpfner & Keith, 2021).

Signs of Unrealistic Goals

• Radical changes
  Example: “I’ll never eat meat again.”
  This sounds like a big change, but if your culture or lifestyle includes meat, that’s a huge shift.
  Try this instead: “I’ll make more plant-based meals this year.”

 

• All or nothing mentality
  Example: “I’ll drink two gallons of water every day.”
  This leaves no room for life’s ups and downs. Goals need grace because life happens.
  Try this instead: “I’ll start having more water with dinner.”

 

• Rooted in wishful thinking
  Research shows that realistic goals create a strong link between intention and action. Unrealistic goals break that link (Avishai et al., 2019).
  Example: “I’ll eliminate all stress from my life.”
  Try this instead: “I’ll schedule 5–10 minutes of mindfulness each week to manage stress.”

 

Setting Goals That Stick

Instead of aiming for perfection, focus on progress and sustainability:

• Start small: Instead of “I’ll become vegan,” try “I’ll make more plant-based meals this year.”
• Be specific but flexible: Swap “I’ll drink five gallons of water a day” for “I’ll drink more water daily.”
• Align with your values: Ask yourself, why do I want this goal? Let your why guide your approach as it will strength your intention and behavior.
• Celebrate progress: Every step counts. Small wins build momentum.

The new year is a great time to reflect and grow, but success comes from goals that fit your life not ones that box you in. This year, challenge yourself to set goals that nurture progress. The best resolutions are about doing what matters, in ways you can sustain.

If you find yourself struggling to stay on track with your goals, engaging in therapy at Behavioral Health Partners may help. Behavioral Health Partners  is brought to you by Well-U, offering eligible individuals mental health services for stress, anxiety, depression, and ADHD. To schedule an intake appointment, give us a call at (585) 276-6900.

 

References

Höpfner, J., & Keith, N. (2021). Goal missed, self hit: Goal-setting, goal-failure, and their affective, motivational, and behavioral consequences. Frontiers in Psychology. https://doi.org/10.3389/fpsyg.2021.704790

Avishai, A., Conner, M., & Sheeran, P. (2019). Setting realistic health goals: Antecedents and consequences. Annals of Behavioral Medicine, 53(12), 1020–1031. https://doi.org/10.1093/abm/kaz012

 

Global Administrator | 12/16/2025